Progress

Good Morning,

My wife and I have been enduring a great deal of self imposed stress
with our recent house renovation (another story all together). The to
do lists and surprises that come with each round of demolition often
leave me drained, upset and sleepless. This often gets reflected in
my daily life around the studio (work) and friends (play). One day a
dear friend could tell I was upset. I explained what was going on and
how it made me feel I was weak in my practice and my mental state if
I could be thrown so easily over something so silly.

With all the compassion of a true bodhisattava (look it up), he said,
"so you think that not getting upset is a sign of progress?" I
realized that at that moment I had been hoping it was. This brought
me to the realization that progress is how quickly I can stabilize my
attention on what I am feeling. Progress is how quickly we can come
back.

The only way to come back to the present moment is to soften and let
go, to accept what we are feeling even if it is completely unfair and
uncomfortable. The we sit with it as we would with a small child.
When a child is sad, you don't shake him and say what's your problem?
You don't ignore him and hope he'll go away, nor can you talk him out
of it. No matter how brilliant your reasoning, you just have to be
there with him. Difficult emotions can be dealt with the same way. We
can be this way with ourselves.

When we clear away the judgments, criticisms, assumptions and beliefs
about our internal experiences, we discover what is left is
tenderness and the ability to feel things deeply. We can be kind to
ourselves not because we we earned it by achieving goals or living up
to an ideal, but because we posses a human heart that, when left to
it's own devices, comes back over and over to its natural state.

Whether circumstances are helpful or hurtful, the mind is happy to be
alive. With this understanding we can meet our own life not with
defensive strategy but, a willingness to let life touch us
completely. This is progress. A open and understanding mind is as
infinite as the sky and, like the sky, can contain sunshine and
storms, snowflakes and hail. Conditions are constantly shifting, but
the sky is always the sky. From within it, the sun rises in the east,
the moon meets the tide and the circle is always complete.

Have a beautiful day and carry this thought - Smooth seas do not make
skillful sailors.

Peace and Love, Jim